Networking

Everybody says “networking” is important yet no class in school teaches us “how” to network, not even in business school even though there are plenty of “networking” events. We show up with a drink in hand, business cards in the pocket, and try to “figure it out” as we go.

You look around to see if anybody you know, if so, great, you quickly move there. Next best option, if somebody looks similar to you, especially if you’re “minority” in the room. If not, you wonder what to do next…you watch people from the corner for a while, try to decide who looks friendlier and debate if to start with a loner or if it’d be easier to join a group because you can “listen” first.

The conversation often starts with ‘what you do’ then ‘where you work’ after exchanging the name. If you happen to have a fancy title or work at a well-known company, you may enjoy the questions. However, if you’re in transition or looking for a job, some people may never come back or others quickly move on to another conversation or a different group.

So what shall we do? Even better, how to enjoy the networking? 3 suggestions:

1. If you see somebody who is alone, looks unsure, or hides at the corner, walk over to say hello. It helps ‘breaking the ice’ for both of you. Always give first, learn the other person’s interests to make connections and add values. If one-on-one is a little scary to start, find a pair to join, 3 of you can take turns and may soon attract more people to join you.

2. Have a few “fun facts” in your pocket for popular questions, e.g. ‘where are you from’, ‘What do you do’ instead of one word answer. Use myself as example for “where are you from” question, if I meet people who love travel and global cultures, I may start with something like ‘I’m from Taiwan; Portuguese sailors called it ‘Formosa’ and it means a beautiful island…’. If we talk about city life, I may say ‘Here we have Starbucks (bars or whatever popular local gathering places are) everywhere, in Taiwan, there is a 7-11 in every corner or KTV (karaoke) is very popular’. For ‘what do you do’ question, instead of saying ‘I’m {job title} or in {job field}’, elaborate more, e.g. if you’re a technology analyst, ’I help evaluate and translate business needs into technical requirements’; if you’re a product manager, ‘I’m the bridge across customers, business partners, and technical teams to turn ideas into solutions and solve challenges’ to make conversation more lively and fit with people and contexts.

3. Ask questions. People love to talk about themselves. You can echo or build upon what they say by repeating the words/ phrases they use and ask about the details, e.g. wow, that sounds a lot of fun, is X your favorite sports? What is your favorite Y? How do you get into Z? Even if it’s a topic you’re not familiar with, you can learn more by asking ‘what T means? How/ where do you use it?’

Being curious, taking the initiative, and giving first work for almost any networking situation and enable you to not only talk with everybody but also enjoy it.